Stray Hawkeye » bad puns

Deep Thoughts, with Stray Hawkeye

Kearn — Wed, 27 Jul 2011 01:53:07 +0000

For a cafeteria to live up to its name, wouldn’t it have to exclusively serve veal?

Honk shoe

Kearn — Thu, 30 Jun 2011 02:34:26 +0000

Fun fact – the Sealy Corporation, makers of mattresses, have a stock ticker symbol of ZZ.

Strangely, no one seems to have ZZZ, which kind of makes me want to start my own publicly trade mattress manufacturing company – Kearn’s Mattress Makers – with the tagline “Making 50% more Z’s than the competition”.

Mr Burns Returns

Kearn — Wed, 22 Jun 2011 04:03:09 +0000

Joe Mauer is off the disabled list and started for the Twins again over the weekend.

Back, with all his distinctive facial hair

Image via Graphics Hut

You have no idea how long I've been waiting to post this pun.

Image via Radiowaves

Nerdy jokes

Kearn — Mon, 20 Jun 2011 00:56:35 +0000

I’m not sure if it’s awesome or terrible that I get pretty much all of these:

14, 24, and 27 made me laugh hard enough I had to pause the video for about 10 seconds to go back and hear the rest.

Via a friend who sent it to me on Facebook

Cool Snow Sculptures

Kearn — Wed, 13 Apr 2011 02:13:49 +0000

Web Urbanist has a round up of some pretty cool (pun intended) large scale snow sculptures. The Calvin and Hobbes ones are particularly good.

I’ll take Area of a Circle for 500 Alex

Kearn — Wed, 23 Mar 2011 02:12:43 +0000

This comment over at BoingBoing made me laugh way more than it probably should:

It’s incredibly stupid, but my favorite pi joke is:

Pi r squared? No, Pi r round, cake r squared!

Ah, local valentine’s day humor

Kearn — Tue, 15 Feb 2011 01:41:45 +0000

From I can has cheezburger

Tron Sex

Kearn — Wed, 22 Dec 2010 03:58:18 +0000

Ever want to read the Karma Sutra, but were waiting until they came out with a video version that riffed on the Sci-fi classic Tron? Well, you’re in luck – the mainframe brings you Tron-a-Sutra (everyone is completely clothed, but still really NSFW). The pictures are amusing, but you need to watch the videos for full effect. They’re really inappropriate, sightly disturbing, and have lots and lots of great sex/technology puns.

Two feet of snow

Kearn — Wed, 22 Dec 2010 03:55:12 +0000

With the snow on Monday, I would say our winter total is already getting pretty close to:

Two feet of snow

Via Make

From what I can tell, the sculpture was made by G. Augustine Lynas, who has a bunch of other really cool sculptures, though unfortunately most of the pictures of them are really small and you can’t click them for bigger versions.

Maybe when the feet above grow up, they can warm up in a giant Red Wing Boots – though Red Wing will have to start working on making one for the other foot too.

Things that come to mind while working at a global consulting company with lots of people who tend to speak in cliches

Kearn — Wed, 27 Oct 2010 03:32:07 +0000

Too many chiefs and not enough Indians – time to ramp up the offshore team.

Too many chiefs ruin the soup – time to hire some Indians who can spell.